Fear Withers the Soul
by Ambient Dark Melody
Summary: What if, every time Sora changed into Antiform, the darkness consumed him a little more? Rated T for swearing in later chapters and detailed gore from the start. No pairings. Sora angst, yay!
1. Unwanted Thoughts

_Sora's way too happy for me, so I decided that he needed a little angst in his life. :3 Because angst is gooooood... Anywayz, my friend and I got to talkin', and blahblahblah, and this little story was born! Woohoo! 'N stuff... o.o Just for the sake of disclaiming things that need to be disclaimed, I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Sora, or anything else Kingdom Hearts-related that is mentioned in this fic. I own the little girl, though. Muahaha. She is the spawn of my wicked, evil mind! Oh, and the lyrics I used are from the song "It's the Fear" by the band Within Temptation, and I'll probably be using these lyrics throughout the story. For all you disclaimer freaks out there, I do not own the lyrics, the song, or the band. O.o I'm going to shut up now. :D_

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**Unwanted Thoughts**

A cold chill blew through the air, causing a slight shiver to run down Sora's back. He didn't mind the icy wind, though--he barely even noticed it. Sighing softly, the boy gazed softly at the coffins and gravestones around him. Darkness surrounded him, but a small latern above him on the stone wall kept the area from being completely pitch black. A gnarled tree with a few of it's roots uplifted from the hard ground towered near Sora, skulls hanging from the branches and clinking against each other in the wind. It wasn't a setting Sora would normally prefer, but at least it was silent, save the occasional wind-howl. He didn't stick out, either--he was, after all, wearing his vampiric attire made just for Halloween Town.

After helping world after world, one after another, Sora, Donald, and Goofy had decided to take a break and go to a world for the simple sake of visiting friends. They'd chosen to drop by Halloween Town to visit Jack Skellington, Sally, and everyone else they knew there since that world was closest. At first, Sora had been enjoying himself in the company of his friends, but something had been tugging at his mind that made him feel uneasy...

_-- It waits for the day I will let it out --_

Sora shuddered again, but this time, it wasn't because of the freezing wind that slowly numbed his cheeks. The persistent tug was still there, and had been for quite some time now. He didn't know when he'd first started noticing it, but it had followed him from world to world, and hadn't left him since he first realized it was there. He couldn't even put his finger on why it bothered him so much--it just did. Whenever he would think about it, though, and try to delve deeper into it to possibly discover why it was there, he would get an unusual sensation, a feeling in the pit of his stomach that made him want to scream in terror...

This same feeling had come upon him when he was conversing with everyone. He'd told them that he wasn't feeling well and asked to be excused, then found his way to the graveyard, sat down with his back against the cold stone wall, and hadn't moved an inch from that spot for the past hour or so. He just stared at the silent and lonely graves ahead of him, though he wasn't really seeing anything at all. As much as he tried, he couldn't get the strange pull on his mind to let go and leave him alone.

Moving his eyes slowly over to a nearby gravestone, Sora was drawn to the words engraved onto the stone and read them in his mind.

Ali Winters

Died at age six

Crushed under collapsed building

_Never_ Always remembered and loved

The word "Always" was scratched through on the stone, and a very jagged "Never" had been carved beside it. Sora's eyes were then drawn to the small angel atop the gravestone whose wings had been broken off. Pointed, crumbling bits of stone remained where the angel's wings had once been. Sora couldn't help but feel sadness for the dead girl, despite the fact that he never knew her. Then, for some reason, thoughts of her death began to arise. A scene of what happened when she died played in his mind, as if he were watching a movie and someone else had pushed the "play" button.

He watched in his mind as a little girl with long black hair and blue eyes of innocence walked through a house, all alone. Suddenly, the ceiling began to splinter and crack. The small child looked up, her eyes filled with horror and fear. She tried to run, but it was too late. The ceiling gave way and caved in, crushing everything beneath it. The little girl cried out in pain as a wooden beam fell onto her back and pinned her against the floor, forcing all of the air out of her small, weak lungs. She gasped for oxygen, but none could come as the beam pressed down even harder when more things from a second floor fell on top of it. The girl clawed desperately at the floor, struggling to escape from under the weight of the beam and everything on it, but it was all too heavy. She wanted to cry out for someone, anyone, to come and help her. All she could do was strain her empty lungs even more than they already were. She began to feel her bones crack under the weight of the debris pile, and once again attempted to get out. The small child winced and tears formed in her eyes when she not only felt, but also heard her leg snap in half. She wanted so badly to scream, but still no air was able to make its way into her lungs.

The weight on top of the girl suddenly increased immensely as the roof of the house also gave way and fell onto her. Something inside of the girl burst, and pain filled her frail body. One of her organs had exploded under the extreme weight, and blood filled her mouth and spilled out onto the floor. More of her bones snapped and splintered, and her insides were slowly crushed, causing fluid to flood throughout her body. Tears streamed down the the dying girl's bloodied cheeks. Her throat constricted, and her lungs did the same as air was still incapable of passing through them. She felt her ribcage collapse, the jagged bones piercing through her torn skin. Finally, her small heart couldn't take anymore pressure, and exploded, blood spurting out of her chest wounds and onto the floor beneath the now-dead girl.

"NO, PLEASE, MAKE IT STOP!!!" Sora screamed as loudly as he could, his fingers gripping his hair tightly at the roots and his head pressed firmly against the wall. Breathing heavily and slowly opening his eyes, the horror-filled boy realized that his nightmare-ish daydream was over. He shakily moved himself back to the position he was in earlier.

"Why couldn't I stop it...? Why did I...even think those things in the first place? What made me do it...?" Sora asked aloud softly, his voice somewhat hoarse from screaming so much. He'd been yelling and shouting for the thoughts to cease only a moment after the girl was hit by the ceiling, but they wouldn't. They kept going, and he was forced to watch against his will. Not only that, but he also felt like he was going through the exact same thing the girl was, like he was feeling her pain.

_-- I can no longer restrain it --_

Sora wanted to know what had caused those horrid, morbid images to go through his head, but then again, he wasn't sure if he really wanted to know the answer or not. He shook his head, then looked around at a few of the other tombstones.

Jonathan Paine

Died at age twenty-three

Car accident

Rosa Nait

Died at age fifteen

Suicide

Terra Part

Died at age thirteen

Fell from 4th story hotel balcony

Thomas Burns

Died at age 19

Shot and killed

Sora decided it would be best to leave the graveyard before any other frightening ideas about their deaths came into his mind, and exited the area to go and find his friends. Perhaps they could distract him long enough to forget the strange things that suddenly plagued his consciousness--things that had never plagued him before.

_-- It's the fear --_

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_Yeah, it was pretty short, but intros from me usually are pretty short. X3 Oh, and if there are any actual people reading this who have the exact same names as the ones I used for the dead people in this chapter, I'm sorry for killing you! O.o; If anyone wants me to continue with this, please review. :) I'll try to make it a lot longer next chapter. 0.o A lot more dark things shall occur, too. (insert evil maniacal laugh here) Flames will be accepted and given to Axel for his enjoyment. :D_


	2. Just the Beginning

_Yesh, another chapter in the wonderful story of Sora's suffering! I was actually hoping I would get this up sooner, but Star Ocean III has overtaken my miiind... X3 ...I'm learning the hard way that Sora was NOT built for angst... O.o But I shall make sure he feels it! It is my mission in life!! MUAHAHAHA!!! ...Anyway, yeah. More lyrics. X3 Yay lyrics! I like dat song. Oh, and don't think of the little lyric bits necessarily as Sora's thoughts, more like little whispers in the very back of his mind... Now read!! o.o_

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**Just the Beginning**

Sora made his way to the Guillotine Square of Halloween Town. The wind blew even fiercer than before, creating a haunting, deep howl that rolled across the empty area. Sora walked around the eerie fountain that poured glowing, green liquid, hoping to find his friends somewhere in the Square. After a moment, he sighed exasperatedly.

"I looked everywhere else, where could they have gone?" he asked aloud, meaning to scratch his head but getting the pumpkin mask instead.

"Sora! Over here!" a voice called. Sora turned to see Jack walking toward him from one of the several buildings in Guillotine Square and waving at him.

"Oh, hey Jack!" Sora yelled back, also waving. "Where are Donald and Goofy?"

As soon as he'd asked, the aforementioned pair walked out of the door behind Jack and followed him.

"Sora! Are ya feelin' better?" Goofy asked, concerned. "You sure were gone a while."

"Yeah. I wasn't too well earlier, but I'm good now," Sora replied, though it wasn't entirely true. The visions of Ali Winters still troubled him very much, but he wasn't going to show it openly. "So, where've you guys been?"

"Dr. Finkelstein wanted to show us something in his lab," Donald answered in his shrill, barely understandable voice.

"Another marvelous experiment of his prepared for next Halloween," Jack said proudly, resting his skeletal fists on his waist.

Sora grinned. "I can't wait to see it in action!" He then sensed a presence behind him, and the grin disappeared. In one swift motion, Sora summoned his Keyblade, turned, and slashed outward, killing a Heartless that had been attempting to catch him in the back.

"Sora, Heartless!" Goofy shouted, though Sora had already noticed the hoard of dark creatures rising from the ground and already destroyed one of them.

"C'mon, guys!" Sora encouraged. "We can take 'em!" Running out into the collection of Heartless, Sora readied his Keyblade in his running stance and attacked. His teammates soon followed, attacking physically and casting spells at the dark, twisted creatures before them.

_xXxXxXxXxXxXx_

Sora panted lightly. A Heartless attacked him from the side, and Sora turned, stabbed into it with the Keyblade, then brought his weapon to the side and finished the Heartless with a horizontal slash. "There's too many of them!" he called out, and it was true. He hadn't expected there to be this many Heartless, and he was getting worn out already, and there were still several left.

"You're right, Sora," Goofy agreed, "but what should we do?!"

Sora thought for a moment, then decided to put his forms to good use. He stood up from his stance and spread his arms out.

"Give me strength!!!" he called out at the top of his lungs, and he was lifted off his feet, a barrier of white energy surrounding him. His three teammates disappeared, and Sora was suddenly filled with power that surged through his body. Each time he went into one of his forms and felt that power, he almost knew for sure that he would win his battle. Clenching his fists, he waited for the intense power surge to subside so he could resume the fight. But instead, he was overcome by something that stole the breath from his chest--a very strong, very penetrating sense of sudden _fear_. Sora's eyes snapped open, and he felt a horrible urge to scream. As soon as the fear had come, though, the power had returned in its place. His Keyblade disappeared, the barrier around him shattered, and he was once again free to fight.

It was like he couldn't control himself, though. He could move freely, but his thoughts were as if they were not his own. He had an intense craving for blood, death, and the screams of others. Moving down to all fours, Sora dug his elongated fingernails into the stone ground and dashed forward, clawing at a Heartless and destroying it in an instant. His arms were tense with the urge to grab something, punch something, tear something apart, make something bleed...

_-- I fear who I am becoming --_

Sora dodged an attack and slayed four more Heartless, all in a single flash. The speed and the power--he didn't know where it came from, but all he wanted to use it for was to cause pain. He jumped into the air and slashed through it, killing more Heartless, then landed on all fours, his head jerking back and forth looking for more opponents. A Shadow lunged at him from behind, and Sora kicked it back, then moved forward and shoved his clawed hand through the Heartless, finishing it off. He dashed through the group of creatures, killing and destroying them one by one. Once he'd annihilated every Heartless in the area, there was nothing left for him to release his tension on. Sora gripped his hair tightly, fell to his knees, buried his face in them, and screamed. His own voice sounded foreign to him, but he didn't care. Something inside him wouldn't let go. The fighting, destroying, and killing didn't make the grip inside him let go, so he hoped screaming would. So he screamed, and screamed. He screamed until his chest hurt, and his throat burned. He screamed until nothing else mattered except releasing the unbearable strain on his heart.

Then, suddenly, the strain was gone. Sora gasped heavily for air, feeling as if he'd finally gone back to normal. The urge to cause pain, the incredible tug inside of him, had left him. Donald, Goofy, and Jack returned, but Sora didn't notice. He was too focused on stopping the trembling of his entire body. When Donald called out to him, it startled Sora so badly that he jerked backward.

"Sora, are you okay?" the duck asked, running over to him, as did Goofy and Jack. Sora lifted himself from the ground and shakily attempted to stand up.

"I...I just..." was all he could get out before he violently threw up, fell on his side to the ground, and lost consciousness.

-- _Just let me pass by --_

_xXxXxXxXxXxXx_

Sora awoke to a sharp pain in his head just behind his eyes. Groaning, he turned his head to the side and felt a warm, smooth surface where his pumpkin mask should've been. He opened his eyes slowly and found that he was lying on the floor of the gummi ship and was back in his normal attire. Goofy turned in his spot at the controls to look back at him.

"Look, Sora's awake!" Goofy exclaimed, seeming very happy that the boy had regained consciousness.

"Sora! What happened to you?" Donald asked, also turning. Sora managed to push himself off the floor and into a sitting position.

"I...dunno..." he answered, trying to remember the unusual occurrence from earlier. "I just felt like I wasn't myself anymore...I don't know how to explain it..."

It was true. He just couldn't find the right words to describe what had happened to him. He knew he'd experienced it before, though. A few times in their earlier battles when he'd tried to access one of his forms, he'd gone into that other strange state instead, and he lost all sense of himself whenever that would happen.

Donald and Goofy looked at him a moment longer, then turned back to facing the front of the ship. Sora stayed silent, then asked,

"Where are we going?"

"To Hollow Bastion," Donald replied. "We thought it'd be better if you rested there instead of Halloween Town, or on the gummi ship."

"Yeah, you didn't look too good after ya upchucked and fell asleep," Goofy added, putting what Sora had done in childish terms.

Sora was about to say something when the sick feeling in his stomach returned. Grimacing, he closed his eyes and leaned against the back wall. Why did he feel so bad all of a sudden? Sora wondered if maybe it was caused by that dark form he went into, though it hadn't bothered him that much the first few times he'd transformed into it--he'd simply brushed it off as nothing to worry about. But maybe now it was time to start worrying...

_-- Hold down your head now --_

"Sora, wake up!"

"We're here!"

Sora jerked awake, his heart pounding. Had he fallen asleep? It didn't feel like it to him, but he must have. He stood up slowly. The sick feeling hadn't left, but it wasn't nearly as strong as before. Eager to get out of the ship, Sora quickly followed Donald and Goofy, who were already out on the ground. He walked out in front of the two and made his way down to the marketplace of Hollow Bastion.

"Let's go find Leon," Donald suggested once he caught up with Sora. "Maybe he can help us find out what's happening to Sora."

"Yeah," Goofy agreed, "then we can fix ya all up, Sora!" Optimistic as always, he smiled.

Sora nodded and smiled back, then led the way to Merlin's house. The trio only encountered a few measly Heartless before arriving. Though he still wasn't exactly feeling well, Sora managed without much trouble to slay the creatures as well as he normally did. A minor inconvenience wasn't going to stop him from protecting other people.

Once the Heartless were taken care of, the three walked up to the front door, and Goofy announced their presence.

"Hello in there, you have company!"

A few moments later, the door opened, and Yuffie poked her head out. She grinned. "Hey guys, what's up? You come to take a break? Well that's good, 'cause we're on our break too! We're just chillin' right now. Hey, you want a drink? Well, Aerith made extra, so you might as well have one. It's a really good mixture! It's kinda funny how we came across it, y'see--"

Donald had been tapping his foot impatiently while she rambled, then finally interrupted.

"Could we go in now?!"

"Oh! Heh, sorry, guess I lost track of myself!" the ninja apologized, smiling. She opened the door wider and Sora walked into the house, Donald and Goofy following.

"Hey." Sora waved, smiling half-heartedly. The sick feeling in his stomach was worsening again, but he tried his best to be polite.

"Hello. It's good to see you again," Aerith said softly, but kindly. She was standing next to the table setting a tray of drinks down onto it. Cid stood next to her with a glass in his hand. He turned to greet them.

"Hey y'all. What brings you here?" he asked, lifting the glass to his mouth.

Sora didn't really want to say anything due to his worsening condition, and he still didn't know what was causing it. Thankfully, Donald spoke up.

"We wanted to ask Leon something," the duck answered Cid's question.

Merlin made his way over to them from the large pile of books. "Oh, I'm afraid Leon went out a while ago, and didn't say where he was going," he informed them. When Sora sighed loudly, Merlin continued, "But I'm sure he'll be back soon!"

"You can just hang out here if you want until Squall gets back," Yuffie suggested, placing her hands on her hips. Sora gave a small smile.

"Yeah, we'll do that." He felt a sharp pain in his head behind his eyes and wobbled a bit. "...Do you guys mind if I rest a little?" he asked, his voice cracking slightly.

"No, not at all," Aerith replied. "You must be tired after all that fighting. You can lie down on the bed over there." She gestured to the bed by the wall and Sora made his way to it.

"Don't let the bedbugs bite," Cid said, but Sora barely heard him. The brunette was too focused on getting some good rest after what'd happened. Sure, he was able to basically disregard the dark change every other time it had happened, but this time it had nauseating side-effects that he just couldn't ignore.

_-- It's growing inside of me --_

Lying down and resting his head on the pillow, he drowned out the voices of everyone else in the room. He kept his breathing as steady as he could, hoping he wouldn't get the urge to throw up again. Eventually, Sora drifted asleep to the sound of his own breaths.

_xXxXxXxXxXxXx_

Darkness. It was everywhere. Blood. He could smell it. He could hear screams deep inside his mind. The pain was so close, yet he couldn't feel it. He was numb to the cold that filled his senses.

Sora didn't know where he was. He didn't care, either. He just wanted out. He would try to call out for someone, anyone, but his throat would constrict everytime. He couldn't make a sound. He tried to find a way out, but he felt as if something was heavily weighing down on his arms and legs.

_-- It's the fear --_

Struggling against it all, he slowly walked forward. He couldn't give up. Not only because so many people were counting on him to come through, but also because he was afraid. Afraid of that place. He didn't want to be there anymore, he had to get out. He wouldn't give up and stay there.

And yet, despite every bit of will he had to leave, every ounce of strength he put into going on, he suddenly felt weak. That weakness brought Sora to his knees. He fell slowly, as if he were in a state of slow-motion. More blood. He could smell it, it was closer. He looked around, but saw nothing but darkness. Why was he smelling blood?

Then he vomited. Blood spewed from his mouth and splattered onto the black ground beneath him. Eyes widening, Sora realized that it was the stench of his own blood he'd been smelling. He tried to cry out again for help, but his throat only constricted on him, preventing him from making any noise. This time, though, it didn't release. Sora was unable to breathe. He grabbed his chest and tried desperately to inhale, but it was a waisted effort. A deafening roar reached his ears from some unknown source, and Sora couldn't take it anymore. He wanted out, he needed out, he had to get out of the darkness. The roar growing louder, sudden pain filling his every fiber from the need to breathe, all he could think was _out, out, I need out, I'm going to die, I want out, I'm going to die, I'm afraid, I want out, die, die, die--_

Light. The roar, the pain, the blood was gone, and Sora opened his eyes to the bright light of Merlin's house. Squinting, Sora moved his eyes to look around. _It was all just a nightmare_, he realized. Relief flooded his mind instantly, calming him down. The others in the room were chatting away just like they had been earlier. Squall--Leon--had returned, and was talking with them, mostly with Donald and Goofy. Sora figured he would stay lying down for a bit longer and closed his eyes, allowing thoughts to rush through his mind about everything that's been happening. Something had been causing him to think darker thoughts lately, and he didn't know what or why. At first, they had started out as simple split-second images or thoughts of death, or pain. Then it took a sudden, drastic turn for worse, and he'd had the horrible images of that little girl, Ali Winters. What had caused that? And what was that strange, dark form he went into from time to time? Initially, Sora thought nothing much of it, but the most recent transformation into it had made Sora extremely nauseous. He didn't exactly **like **the form, either--it made him want to cause immense pain. If he wasn't able to cause that pain, then he would feel it, and he certainly didn't want that. And the dream he'd just had; he hoped it wasn't a premontition of some kind. Where were all these dark things coming from all of a sudden? He just couldn't figure it out.

_-- Long ago it came to me, and ever since that day --_

Sighing softly, Sora could only wish he knew what was slowly happening to him. He decided he might as well get up and discuss things with Squall right now, and opened his eyes. Blood. Sora's blue eyes grew wider in horror. A body--male or female, he couldn't tell--was pinned against the ceiling by dark red veins of some kind, and blood covered the area around the body and dripped down onto Sora. The body was horrendously mutilated, and its eyes were just as wide as Sora's, and filled with just as much fear and horror. The mouth was twisted and open in agony. The body stared down at Sora in silent suffering, and Sora screamed. He screamed, closed his eyes, scrambled backward against the wall, and kept screaming. He kept screaming as he felt someone start shaking him. In fact, he screamed even harder.

"Sora?! Sora!! Dammit Sora, open your eyes!!!"

The boy stopped his frantic yells and opened his eyes, breathing hard. Squall was gripping his shoulders tightly and staring at him with a mixture of surprise and concern on his face. Sora looked back at the ceiling, only to find that nothing was there. He looked wide-eyed back at Squall, then at the ceiling, then Squall, then the ceiling again. He then groaned, turned, and smacked the wall with his forehead, his eyes squeezed shut in irritation at the unnecessary hallucination he'd just had. Squall sighed, his expression softening, and shook his head.

"I think I'm starting to see what you were talking about earlier..." he said to Donald and Goofy as he watched Sora continue beating his head against the wall.

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_ZOMG DEAD BODEH!!! O.o Yeah, poor Sora, he's going insane. X3 Oh well, he'll get over it...maybe... o.o More things will happen in the next update, or at least I'll try to make them happen! I just needs some ideas, first... X.X If anyone wants to share, I'll happily listen/read. And I'll try as hard as I can to get the next update in within the next week. :D_


	3. Embrace It

_Zomg this thing got updated a lot later than I was planning on. O.o Aaanywayz, here's another chapter for...um...you guys. :D And a guest star from Organization XIII. Le gasp! o.o Y'know, it's funny. I am not a Sora fangirl in even the slightest way, and yet I'm writing a fanfic about him...wtf. I guess I'm just weird like that. X3 Now, on with the fic!!_

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**Embrace It**

"So what do you think is causing this?" Squall asked, standing with his arms crossed. Sora stood before him leaning lazily against the wall, hands behind his head, and Donald and Goofy were at the table talking to Cid and Aerith. Sora shrugged and shook his head.

"We were hoping you could help us with that," he mentioned. He had just finished explaining his strange experiences and now awaited Squall's opinion on the matter as the young man stood with a thoughtful expression upon his face. After a few moments, Squall shifted his weight and sighed.

"I can't think of anything right now that might explain it," he said. "Give me a little more time."

Sora moved his hands back to his sides. "Yeah, okay..." he mumbled, his head hanging slightly. He wanted to figure out what was happening to him as soon as possible, and he was somewhat disappointed with Squall's lack of resolve. But, if he had to wait, he might as well not complain. Squall seemed to sense the boy's disappointment.

"Listen Sora," the man said, "I may not know why this is happening to you, but I promise that we'll fix this, no matter what." He gave a small smile, and though his tone still sounded as it always did, his voice held reassurance. Sora smiled back.

"Yeah, I hope so."

Yuffie then came strolling merrily in from outside, where she had been doing who-knows-what.

"Sora!" the girl said, bounding up to them. "You know what will make you feel better? Ninja-ing! C'mon, come help me steal from little kids and old ladies!" She awaited his answer with wide, bright eyes. Sora laughed a little, though he really didn't think it was very funny.

"Ahaha, no thanks Yuffie, I'm sure you'll do fine on your own..."

Yuffie pouted. "Aww, c'mon!"

Squall, seemingly already tired of the young ninja, rubbed his temple with one hand. "Yuffie," he said with slight irritation, "why don't you go see how far you can jump off the top of the Hollow Bastion castle...?"

Yuffie huffed and crossed her arms. "I can see when I'm not wanted! Well, I'm just gonna go steal money and materia without you then!" She marched toward the door and opened it. "...Though free-falling off the castle does seem pretty fun..." With that, she left, and Sora rubbed the back of his head and grinned, mostly because he had nothing to say. He always figured it was best to just smile when words went unfound.

Squall just frowned. "I hope she realizes that it's going to be dark soon..." he muttered, then looked back at Sora. "From what you said earlier, it sounds like you've been through a lot mentally, lately. You should get some good rest. If you want, you can stay here."

Sora didn't want to impose, but he didn't want to sleep in the gummi ship, either. Besides, he figured he'd feel safer here with everyone else. "Yeah, I'd like to stay," he told Squall, smiling. Soon, a small bed made out of blankets was set up on the floor for Sora, and Donald and Goofy settled for sleeping in a corner. Everyone else decided to stay at Merlin's house, as well. Aerith slept in the bed, Merlin floated in the air with his magic in a sleeping position and a blanket covering him, Yuffie came back and slept on a bookshelf, and Cid fell asleep at, or more rather on, the computer terminal. Squall, who insisted he wasn't tired, simply sat at the table and watched over everyone. Eventually he, too, was sound asleep, his head resting on the tabletop. Silence filled the dark room.

-- _Fear of the dark --_

_xXxXxXxXxXxXx_

He didn't feel as safe as he'd thought he would.

Sora was awake, and he was frightened. He was afraid to move, afraid to make any noise. Afraid to even breathe loudly. Somewhere along the way of falling to sleep, he had been overcome by the strong feeling that something that shouldn't be there was with him, watching him. He couldn't figure out what it was, whether it was real or in his mind, but he knew it was still there, and it scared him.

_-- I fear that I am losing the struggle within --_

Sora laid on his stomach, the covers above the back of his neck and his hands resting at the sides of his pillow. His face was mostly buried into the pillow, but was raised enough so that he could stare blankly at the wall opposite him with wide eyes in an attempt to stay awake. He didn't want to go to sleep. He knew horrible things would happen in his dreams. He didn't want to dream. He had to stay awake.

Sora moved his eyes to look around the room. The darkness made it seem larger, somehow. More spacious. He wondered how just turning out the lights could make a place seem like that. The darkness also looked...inviting. Sora felt as if he could simply reach out and embrace it, and rest forever, never having to wake up...

He quickly discarded those thoughts. Why was he suddenly beginning to accept the darkness? It was the very thing he was fighting against to save all the worlds! Shaking his head, Sora found the courage to slowly stand up, the blankets slipping silently off him. He made sure not to wake any of the others and, as quietly as he could, put on his shoes and stepped outside. Chilled air swept over him, and the boy shivered slightly. The thousands of other worlds dotted the black night sky, and the only light in the area was a tall lamp outside one of the other houses. Sora looked around for a moment, then wondered why he had even come out here in the first place. Perhaps he so strongly wanted to get away from that disturbing sensation of being watched that his legs simply carried him out of there. Whatever the reason, Sora shrugged and decided he might as well take a walk, and began striding between the buildings toward the baily. As he walked, he began to notice something: where were all the Heartless? He stopped. Readying himself for a surprise attack, he waited. Nothing happened. Minutes passed by, and Sora became confused.

"...Are they on a break or something...?" he asked aloud. Of course, he wasn't surprised when an answer didn't come. Sighing, he decided not to worry too much about it, and resumed walking toward the baily. As he did, thoughts of the recent events swam through his mind. What was happening to him? Fear had suddenly touched him, and more strongly than it ever had. But why? And what was it he was afraid of? It seemed like it was something in his own mind that was scaring Sora. Paranoia? No, it was much too real to just be paranoia...

Sora sighed loudly. Maybe it had something to do with the Keyblade? He doubted it. Perhaps he had been exposed to some kind of darkness in the past...but what? Why did darkness seem so much closer to him now than it ever had? Why was it haunting him so much?

_-- To give it a reason --_

Sora stopped walking. He had been so immersed in his thoughts that he'd walked all the way to the ravine trail outside the castle gates. The boy gazed out across the land beyond the cliff--more darkness. Though, it wasn't completely dark; the blue stones that made up the cliffside and the ground beneath it gave off a surreal, light blue glow, making it somewhat easier for Sora to see. Yawning heavily, he suddenly felt his weariness, and sat down to lean against the cliffside above him. For some reason, he felt it was easier for him to sleep in the cold ravine than it was in the house. He wanted to be liberated from the thoughts of darkness that plagued his mind, if only for a short while. Letting his own breaths be his lullaby, Sora slowly slipped away from the real world...and then was roughly ripped back into it.

"Ah!" he softly cried as his body jerked slightly. He quickly looked to the source of the noise that had awoken him, and saw a darkness portal forming near the cliff edge. Immediately on his guard, Sora jumped to his feet and summoned the Keyblade to his hand. The creator of the portal finally emerged from the dark depths--a member of Organization XIII with long blue hair, an X-shaped scar upon his face, and cold, golden eyes. Sora glared at him.

"You're from Organization XIII, aren't you?!" he yelled angrily, moving into his usual battle stance. The man smirked at him.

"You're very perceptive," he replied cooly. "I am Sai'x. It's nice to meet you, Keyblade Master."

Sora frowned. "Are you trying to play games with me? 'Cause I'm not in the mood!!"

"Of course not. We can't play around with what's happening to you, now can we?" the blue-haired man asked, smirking once again. Sora's eyes widened slightly.

"How do you know about that?! Tell me! Tell me what you know!!"

"Now calm down, Sora. We wouldn't want to irritate it," Sai'x said, his voice still icy.

Sora gritted his teeth and growled under his breath. This man obviously knew something, and Sora wanted to know what it was. He would find out, one way or another. He wasn't going to let this man get away without telling him. Gripping the handle of his Keyblade firmly, he shouted furiously,

"Tell me what you know right now, or I'll make sure you regret it!!!"

Sai'x just chuckled. "Sounds like the young child is desperate," he said lowly. "Perhaps it would be more entertaining to show you than to tell you..." Holding out his arm, the mysterious man pointed his hand at Sora and clenched his fist. Sora abruptly felt a slight sense in the pit of his stomach, a sense that shouldn't have been there. He didn't want it there, he wanted it gone, so badly that he began to shake.

The Organization member grinned slowly at Sora's reaction. "Let's see how much I can provoke it," he murmured, and clenched his fist harder.

Sora immediately was overcome by several immense feelings--anxiety, paranoia, panic, horror, fear--and they overwhelmed him. He screamed. He dropped the Keyblade, grabbed his hair, squeezed his eyes shut, and screamed. All those sensations felt even more overbearing in the darkness of his mind, but he didn't want to open his eyes. He knew it wouldn't help. The strong feelings strained his heart, and it pained him. He heard someone screaming. Was it him? It couldn't be him screaming. He'd never felt so afraid, so frightened to scream like that in his life, it couldn't be him. He realized though that it was him when the screaming stopped, and he suddenly had no more air in his lungs. Sora wanted to breathe, but the horrible sensations in his mind and heart constricted him. He heard himself yell, "What're you doing to me?!" He didn't know when he'd taken a breath, but he must have. Why was he yelling things without him knowing it? Had the fear somehow separated him? He didn't want to lose himself. Managing to somehow go back, Sora consciously screamed as loudly as he could,

"GET AWAY FROM ME, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!"

It all stopped. Sora gasped heavily for air, his arms shakily supporting him on the hard ground. He didn't remember falling to his knees. Opening his eyes slowly, he glared up at Sai'x, all the fear and panic having been replaced with anger and hatred toward the Organization member.

Sai'x smiled coldly again. "I guess Xemnas was right," he said, seeming to be interested in what Sora had just experienced. "It is beginning to take you over..."

Sora growled. The mention of Xemnas didn't spark his interest, all he cared about was that this man standing before him knew what was wrong with him. He stood up to demand answers again, but was cut short when every one of those heart-wrenching emotions came rushing back, only this time it seemed as if the intensity was tripled. Sora stood with wide eyes. He didn't scream this time. The sheer force of it all suddenly hitting him at once stunned him so much that he barely even twitched a muscle. It tore at his mind, his heart, and his soul, and all he could do was stand there. He finally moved, and fell back against the cliff behind him, his mouth open in a silent, agonizing scream. Tears came to his eyes, it hurt him so badly. The fear, the panic, the horror, it all seemed physical this time somehow. He wanted to make a noise, to let the pressure out of his system, but the screams were caught in his throat. The constraint built up, and he couldn't take it. He trembled, and his mouth stayed open for when he could finally scream. He never knew a mere emotion could do so much damage to a person.

_-- There is no escape --_

As soon as Sora had fallen against the cliff wall, Saix's smile had disappeared. "Damn..." he mumbled. "I may have provoked it too much..."

Sora sat on the ground, his hands gripping the ground beneath him so hard that his entire arms shook. It seemed like an eternity, even though it was only about half a minute, before he could say anything.

"What're you doing to me...?" he asked, his voice trembling and cracking several times. He didn't know whether he was talking to the man from the Organization, or to something within himself. Either way, he was terrified. He felt as if he were going to die any minute now. Pain racked him, and his mind reeled. His heart screamed for him, since Sora was still unable to do so. How long would it last? Was he really going to die? Questions raced through his head, and he once again heard someone screaming. It must have been him, he'd been wanting to scream for so long. Though, even though he knew he finally was, the constraint was still within him. None of the pressure could be lifted, and he continued to be torn apart by it. Why wouldn't it stop? He felt the tears escape and slide down his burning cheeks.

_-- My strength is fading --_

Sora managed to open his eyes. Darkness surrounded him. What was happening to him? The pain in his heart, mind, and body began to subside. Maybe it only hurt him because he was resisting it?

_-- I have to give in --_

He couldn't take it anymore. He knew he might end up dying if he continued to try and escape it. The anguish was just too much. He didn't want to suffer any longer. Leaning his head back and allowing more tears to roll down his face, he reluctantly embraced the darkness. All the pain suddenly disappeared, and in its place was an immense sensation of power. He knew he had gone into that dark form, the one that only recently began haunting him. Looking over at Sai'x, Sora suddenly felt a need to kill, a need to see blood. He wanted something to die by his hands. He stood up, still glaring menacingly at the man. His breathing seemed not his own. He felt disconnected somehow, but he was still all there. He didn't care at the moment, though. All he wanted was to cause pain to others.

_-- I can no longer restrain it --_

Sora leapt angrily at Sai'x, roaring loudly, his claws ready to slash. When Sai'x jumped back to avoid the attack, Sora swiftly landed on all fours, his fingers digging into the ground, and dashed forward to the other's landing point. Sai'x quickly summoned his claymore in midair and blocked Sora's fierce kick. Sora was fast, though--extremely fast. As soon as his foot made contact with the man's weapon, he used it to propel down to the ground, then launched himself back into the air, lashing out with his clawed fingers at Sai'x's chest. Grunting, Sai'x fell back onto the ground on one knee. He spat out a few drops of blood, then looked back up at Sora, who was standing only several feet away, his body twitching slightly and his pointed teeth showing in an angry scowl. The boy continued to glare heavily at him with glowing yellow eyes, his body emersed in darkness.

"Sora," Sai'x said slowly, "it's taking you over...did you allow this...?"

"Shut up!!" Sora yelled, his voice horribly distorted for some reason. "Just shut up!!!"

_-- Don't feed my fear, --_

"I swear...I swear, I'LL KILL YOU!!!" Sora screamed maliciously, and leapt at Sai'x again.

_-- if you don't want it out --_

The Keyblade Master attacked Sai'x with every bit of strength had. He wanted to watch him die. He wouldn't stop until he was dead. Sai'x somehow managed to block most of Sora's hits with his claymore, but the boy was much stronger than normal. Sora saw no threat, and continued his barage. After a short while, Sai'x suddenly broke through his offense and slammed the claymore into Sora, causing the boy to fly backward. Sora caught his balance quickly in the air and landed, then hastily ran on all fours at Sai'x again. He felt no pain. He was completely numb. Sai'x wasn't quitting, though. He opened the blade on his claymore and attacked Sora just as heavily as the boy had attacked him. Sora dodged as best he could, but Sai'x swung his weapon and finally caught Sora in midair, forcing him against the cliff wall and pinning him there. Sora growled and struggled to get free, but to no avail. He scratched and clawed viciously at the weapon and at the wall. Sai'x glared down at him with hard eyes.

"I suppose I'll just have to beat you out of this state," he said, his voice still calm. He replaced the claymore that held Sora to the wall with his foot. "It's not yet time for you to be completely taken over..." The man then removed his foot and, before Sora could make a move to get away, Sai'x began slamming the claymore into him repeatedly. At first, Sora didn't feel any of it. He just wanted to get away and continue attempting to murder the blue-haired Nobody. But after a short while, the pain began to come. It slowly turned more and more intense as Sai'x proceeded to pound him relentlessly with his weapon, until it became so unbearable that Sora cried out with every blow. Sai'x stopped his attacks soon after the boy had begun crying out. Sora fell limply to the ground, bleeding slowly from a few of the cuts in his skin.

"Good, it seems you've returned to normal," the man stated, then summoned a darkness portal behind him. "Don't give in too quickly to it, Sora. We need to use it, later." With that, he stepped backward into the portal, and disappeared, the portal closing behind him.

Sora still hadn't budged from his position on the ground. His body hurt so badly, he didn't want to get up. What had happened to him? He could hardly remember anything from after he gave in to the darkness that tore at him so mercilessly. He hadn't even heard what Sai'x had just said to him. He didn't think it mattered. The man was gone, and he was glad for that. Sora felt blood drip into his eye. Why was he bleeding? He was so tired. He decided to worry about it later and slowly closed his eyes. Fatigue completely overcame him, and Sora just wanted to sleep. He silently prayed that he wouldn't die while he was sleeping. Why he thought he would, he didn't understand, but he couldn't dwell on it for very long. He quickly slipped away into a very much needed deep slumber. Before he did, though, he was sure he heard someone calling his name...

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_Sai'x is a meany. X3 He's one of my fav Org. characters, though, don't think I hate him. He's like, number 4 on my fav list... Anyway, yeah. Stuff. THINGS!! O.o Please review. n.n I'll try to update faster than I did this last time!_


	4. Let Me Sleep

_I have updated! o.O And it's an extremely short update... O.o DON'T HURT ME!!! I didn't plan on it being so short, but it felt like continuing the story on this chapter would sorta ruin the effect that it was giving so far...so I left it like this. :3 ...Please dun hurt me... o.o I'll try to make the next one waaay longer. n.n_

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**Let Me Sleep**

He could feel pain. He could feel it, but it seemed far away. It was like he was disconnected. Sora drifted through himself, lingering within the state of mind between awake and sleeping. He was so tired, so weary. He was unable to fall completely asleep, though. Someone was calling his name, keeping him from escaping the reality that held his pain.

"Sora! Sora!!"

_Go away, _he thought faintly. _I just want to sleep, leave me alone...go away..._

"Sora, open your eyes! Say something!"

The voice seemed to echo through his mind. _Please go away, _Sora continued to think. He didn't have enough strength to speak the words. _I just want to sleep...please...I'm so tired..._

"Dammit Sora, wake up!"

_Please..._

"Don't die on us, Sora!! SORA!!!"

Sora's full attention was on the far-away voice now. Die? Why would he die? Was he going to? He didn't want to die. But he was so tired...

He felt as if he needed this sleep more than anything...

So tired...

Reluctantly, the boy opened his eyes and forced himself back into full reality. A blurred figure stood before him, and Sora blinked it into clearer vision.

"Leon...?" he said, almost at a whisper. "What're you talking about...? Am I dying...?"

Squall was kneeling down on one knee in front of him with both hands on his shoulders. The older man's eyes widened slightly, then he smiled, seeming very relieved that Sora had decided to wake up. He answered Sora with a calm voice. "I wasn't sure if you were or not. I found you here bloody and beaten... You weren't breathing either, even though your heart was still beating."

"I wasn't...breathing..?" asked Sora quietly. He couldn't think of anything else to say. Normally he would just smile when the right words wouldn't come to his mind, but he didn't this time. He couldn't find reason to smile. He just couldn't. Instead, he simply attempted to recall what had happened earlier to cause him to be so heavily injured.

Squall stayed silent for a moment, then questioned, "How did this happen?"

Sora closed his eyes and tried as hard as he could to remember. All he could grasp was that there was immense fear and pain, then power, and every bit of it had come from the darkness. He couldn't reminisce how he had gotten hurt, though. He opened his eyes and shook his head. "I dunno," was all he answered with. He figured it was best not to tell Squall about the darkness that he'd accepted so the pain would go away.

Squall sighed softly. "Alright...let's get you back to Merlin's house so we can heal you." Sora felt his arm being put around Squall's neck, and he was pulled upward into a standing position as the other stood. Sora was supported with Squall's other arm around his waist, and they began walking slowly forward. Sora did his best to keep up, though he was still very tired.

What had happened to him? Why was he so tired, why did he feel as if every drop of his energy had been consumed? It must've been because of the darkness that had been tearing him apart. But why was the darkness there in the first place? He continued to think about it as he and Squall made their way to the baily. Suddenly, an ache appeared in Sora's head. It rapidly grew in strength, and Sora squeezed his eyes shut. It became stronger and stronger, and reached the point where it felt as if someone were stabbing him repeatedly just behind his eyes, and it kept growing. Sora opened his eyes, and his vision was blurred.

_What's wrong with me? _he thought, wishing the pain away. He was so tired, he didn't want any more pain...

A loud roaring that sounded like a train reached his ears, and it deafened him. He groaned. He felt so bad already, he couldn't take any of this. It was overwhelming him, and he just wanted it to go away. The roar grew louder, and the pain in his head grew stronger. He looked down at the ground and saw flashes of blood. Closing his eyes, he shook his head, hoping the images would go away. Why was this happening? He was so tired...

When he opened his eyes again, the image of blood on the ground stayed, clearer than day. Lying in the pool of blood was himself, slaughtered and dead with wide, blank eyes. Sora took a deep breath and shuddered, the pain and roar growing more and more intense. Before he knew it, he hit the ground and was losing consciousness.

So tired...

_Is this where I die...? _he thought in the deepest part of his mind, and the world turned black. He could finally rest...

_-- Just let me pass by... --_

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_I'll just go ahead and tell you, this isn't where the story ends. It shall be continued, so don't worry. n.n Hopefully with much longer chapters next time. O.o Please review! n.n_


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